Unexpected Outcomes

Chloe's arrival has created a number of unexpected outcomes in our family, one of which is the fact that Ryan is actually the one writing this blog. Go figure. Unfortunately, I am writing it from my computer, where I don't have as many pictures as Amy, so I can't post one of the pictures I would like to, but hopefully Amy will do it when she gets a chance.

So here are my stories.

The first set of stories are about Katie. The birth of Chloe has awakened an interest within Katie about her gender identity. As we approached Chloe's delivery date, Katie began to ask more questions about what it is like to "born a baby." I think we told her at one point something about how it hurts to give birth as a way of letting them know how much their mother loves them and was willing to do to bring them into the world. Days or weeks later, Katie began to put pieces of the puzzle together, and realized that since she is a girl, she could be a mother, and if she is a mother, then it could hurt her too. Then, during the week before Chloe was born, she asked me where babies come out of their mommies. I answered the question as clearly but also discretely as I could. She promptly announced that she did not want to "born a baby." I tried to reassure her that this would be her decision when the time comes and she could make up her own mind about it.

After Chloe was born, everyone (including Katie) was happy to have this adorable addition to our family. On the day Amy came home, I was taking care of the kids while Amy went upstairs to feed Chloe. Katie asked where Amy was going. I told her that she was going upstairs to feed Chloe.

Katie thought about this for a moment, and then asked what Chloe would be eating.

"Milk," I said.

Katie pointed out to me that there is no milk upstairs.

I explained to Katie that the milk comes from Mommy. Katie then exclaimed, "LIKE A COW??!!?"

I'm not sure there was anything I could say at that point. I tried to point out to her that most mammal mothers provide milk for their children, not just cows, but I think it may be too late and the very idea of motherhood has scared her off for life.

The second set of stories I have is about Andrew. We were worried about how Andrew would respond to a little sister. He tends to dominate his mother's attention, and we were not sure how he would respond to having to share it. We thought jealousy was a strong possibility.

Instead of jealousy, Andrew has displayed an amazing attachment to Chloe. He constantly wants to hold her, touch her, tickle her, cuddle with her, and carry her around. We only let him hold and cuddle her, and that only with close supervision. His holding and cuddling is, shall we say, highly aggressive. We are afraid that any lapse in our vigilance could have dire consequences for Chloe. He is, nevertheless, adorable, when he holds her--a full body hug with his cheek caressing hers. A friend of ours pointed out to Amy that he and Chloe were up in heaven waiting together to come down to our family for quite a while, and Andrew is excited to see her after having been apart for almost three years. We love that image. And if Chloe survives Andrew's affection, she will be one tough girl.

One last image of Andrew. With Chloe's arrival and me staying home from work, Andrew and I have been spending a lot of time together. Yesterday Andrew and I went for a walk in the woods. We went along a path we had only taken once before. The last time we took this path, we passed a section where there was some garbage at the bottom of a hill. We had discussed this with the kids, telling them that it was "sad" that people left their garbage in the woods. We have only done this once--probably over a month ago--but as Andrew and I walked passed this section of the woods, he pointed down the hill and said, "Garbage. Sad." Here is a picture.